A Dream Come True

On July 30th 2021, a 9yr quest came to head at the Tatsumi Aquatic Arena in Tokyo, Japan. For the first time in almost a decade, Trinidad and Tobago had a female representative for swimming at the Olympic Games. For me to inhale the chlorine-rich air and take my mark for the Women's 50m freestyle was in itself a miracle after all that it took for me to get to that point. Returning from retirement with nothing but an undying dream and love for the sport, I soon found myself on a hero's journey. My childhood dream turned into an extraordinary mission that could not be stopped by injury nor injustice, affliction nor pandemic. This dream was far bigger than the dreamer.  

If you are tracking with me from my previous blog entry, I ended with this: I do not (swim) as one (swimming) aimlessly, I do not fight like a boxer beating the air. No, I discipline my body and bring it under subjection so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.          - 1 Cor 9:25-27 

This journey is my legacy. I continue to share the metamorphic lessons learnt along the way so that the next person to venture this quest, may find courage to JUMP and give their best. 

I have hope to see the talented athletes from my Caribbean region giving and gaining all that they can from this wonderful sport; bravely and courageously soaring to new heights and making waves for generations to come. I want to see us all, together pushing boundaries and ignoring them because we believe all things are possible. 

2012- It seemed preposterous for a girl with a torn labrum and detached bicep to even consider competing for championships with a D1 university team, let alone competing for her country at the London Olympic Games. My hopes for the London Games were dampened by a severe diagnosis in 2011. However, the recovery process from SLAP tear that was "one of the worst" that my orthopedic team had seen, served to expand my weight-bearing capacity. What I didn't know then, was that I became stronger- building resilience, as I grappled the frustration and pain of the process and my circumstances. I was made stronger because of the adversity and because I persevered. 

2016- What felt like my breaking point, turned out to be my boiling point for a transition to a new state of mind. When my body could not be destroyed, my mind suffered a blow as my dance with injustice surrounding the 2016 Games paralyzed me for some time. I completed my collegiate career and Road to Rio with a valuable lesson from my college coach. "Remember to enjoy the journey" Simple, yet powerful as I realized that we spend more time pursuit of our goals than at the destination. A hard pill to swallow but I learnt the need find a way to count it ALL joy. These flagrant fouls and disappointments in life are eggy and coarse ingredients of a delectable pie. They are quite unpalatable in its raw state but combined with heat, they add much needed character to the batter. We can delve into my cooking passions another time but this character building lesson of the Rio chapter also stemmed from another verse of scripture: Rom 5:3-5. I learnt that my creator was using my affliction to produce endurance which produced character which produced a lasting and unfailing hope. 

2020- When I thought I had been through the worst of it, the upheavals by the COVID-19 pandemic gave life a whole new meaning. The finish line was moved further away and every measurement of success was stripped away. How can I achieve my best performance when there is no event for me to carry through? How can I compete for a medal without competition? Why should I even bother to work hard when there is nothing to show the work that I put in? At the height of the pandemic, when the mental strain was at its highest and motivation was at it's lowest it that the realignment with my values and clarity of vision that carried me through the tough days. My mentor guided me through this tough season to see purpose in the shadows of darkness. When all external measurements of success are stripped away, why do I play? What would success look like for me in this season? Why do I want to be successful? In a world full of problems, is there one burdens you the most? These were the new questions that navigated me though the uncharted waters of the COVID-19 pandemic.

2020ne- On July 30th 2021, I stood tall on the blocks with eyes fixed on the literal finish line with the goal of success; hitting the touchpad first, achieving my personal best time and advancing to another round in the competition but I also started this journey to my Olympic dreams with the goal of significance; doing something that makes a positive difference in my world; having my experiences inspire a world of possibilities. I did not achieve personal success in that moment and truth be told that gutted me ...... but did not paralyze me. These measurements of success, although meritable and coveted, its achievement would provide personal gratification, then quickly fade once the moment is passed. On the other hand, each chapter of my journey and each stroke that I took was significant. This hero's journey was less about what I did at the end but more about who it was for in the end. My dear friend reading this entry, that big dream inside of you was put there on purpose. You have got what it takes but it would take all you've got to get to reach the finish line. If you haven't already, I encourage you to take the J.U.M.P......wonders await you in the deep!